The 101s' 2025–2026
Relationship
Dojo
Life-changing connections await
How fulfilling are your relationships and friendships? Could be better?
The 101s Relationship Dojo, with its practical tools and other insightful relationship explorers, can be the peer-powered relating academy you were denied. Monthly calls, peer group sessions, plus an online discussion group, all for the skills that will materialise the relational universe that we all seek.
Pray, What is This?
The 101s Relationship Dojo is an online English-language continuous collective journey designed by 101s for cultivating more fulfilling, authentic, and conscious relationships. It’s a guided, moderated space where we explore, in community, how we show up in close relationships, what our part is —and how we can take responsibility for it — how to ‘upgrade’ patterns that don’t serve us, and embody more intentional ways of relating.
We Doth Change
The Dojo is where we make real change together: we discover what’s between us and the connections we crave — and then transform and heal it through group support, shared stories, advanced tools (premortem, generative conflicts, pods, etc.), and the decades of rich relationship experience that the dojo and the 101s bring to the table.
These be our Values
Our values are why we’re doing this. We are not assuming that anyone, including ourselves, can ever embody them fully — but we come back to them, again and again:
Inclusivity, feminism (sex-work-affirming, anti-punitivist, trans-inclusive, queer, sex-positive), accountability, anti-capitalism, decolonialism, anti-classism, disruption of oppressive hegemonic values (such as monogamy), and finding our liberated selves in community. Discover all our values in this document.
What happens in the dojo?
Monthly 3-hour Workshops
The videoconferences where we all explore, reflect and practice different aspects of relating (see below for examples).
Online Discussion Group
Where we discuss the topics asynchronously.
Optional: participate based on your availability and curiosity
Peer Support Subgroup of 4–7 Peers
Receive regular support and accompaniment; discuss the dilemmas, learnings, and explorations that are coming up in your daily life.
2 FREE Coaching Sessions
Leapfrog in your relational work with coaching sessions from the 101s-endorsed relationship coaches directory — which includes the 101s themselves.
Oh, And No Exams!
Except for life itself. Just saying...
Content
Each month, we deep-dive into a topic. Through guided exercises, reflection, and group discussions, we’ll shine light on unconscious patterns, build healthier relational habits, and learn to stay connected — both to ourselves and others.
Here’s a glimpse of exploration journeys we have in store for the dojo:
- Relational utopia: what's possible? Expanding our relational imagination
- The mirror of relationships: how we see ourselves in others
- Boundaries & consent: where do I end and you begin?
- The shadow in relationships: uncovering projections and unmet needs
- Patterns & archetypes: the roles we play
- Attachment styles: understanding relational needs and patterns
- Honing communication skills: speak your heart
- Humour, joy, pleasure: how to fly high
And it’s not all excavation and splitting hairs — we’ll celebrate wins, support each other through challenges, and share silly memes.
Tools
- Premortem
- Blame vs. contribution
- The ten thinking hats (adapted by 101s from The Six Thinking Hats)
- Intention setting
- The 101s BlaBla Kit for Better Conversations
- Community spotlights for relationship challenges
- Pods (support, accountability, etc.)
- Relationship intimacy questions
- Check-ins (e.g., RADAR)
- Rituals
- Difficult Conversations tools
- Kanban for relationships
- The relationship smorgasbord
- Dragon dreaming for relationships
Does it cost to be in the dojo?
It has to, so that our dedication to it may be sustainable.
The monthly payment you are looking at is anywhere between €10 and €40, based on your income and other relevant factors, and whether you will join the dojo online only, or in-person, too (in Barcelona). But you are also welcome to pay more, to support others who can’t afford the entire price.
You will receive a one-month discount if you pay the entire year at once.
The minimum duration you can pay in advance is three months. I.e., if you want to test out the dojo, you can do so for a minimum of three months.
PLANS
Comfortable financially
€40 . 00
/month
- no debt
- average/high income
- savings or family support
Financially average
€25 . 00
/month
- low debt
- low income
- some savings, family support
Financially stressed
€10 . 00
/month
- substantial debt
- low income
- no savings or family support
Why is your pricing complicated?
We believe that the amount of money that people have says much more about our society (which, in this respect and many others, we see as unequal and unjust) than it does about them. As such, we want to allow as many people to participate, regardless of their financial situation, and fairly. For now, our approach is to ask people to contribute resources that reflect both what they have and what they feel our offering is worth.If you have other ideas on how we might balance these values, we'd love to hear about them.
Cost transparency
As an exercise in transparency: we calculate that the actual cost of running this dojo for us is between €10,000 and €12,000 annually. This includes our research and preparation time, candidate interviews, moderation, the group sessions, the costs of the space, the coaching sessions, etc.:
Hover over the circles to see what each slice represents ⬆️
Press and hold the red circles to see what each slice represents ⬆️
What do we get for those prices?
In-depth sessions
Monthly 4-hour in-person in-depth sessions exploring different aspects of relating (see above for examples)
FREE Blabla kit!
The 101s kit for improving difficult conversations will be yours.
Discussion group
Discuss the topics asynchronously through a separate online discussion group that you can dip in and out of as you need.
Peer-support group
Regular support and accompaniment through your subgroup of 4–7 peers, where you discuss the dilemmas, learnings, and explorations that are coming up in your daily life.
The 101s' Relationship Dojo
FREE Coaching Sessions
Leapfrog in your relational work via coaching sessions that accompany you through your individual journey. Two free sessions from 101s-endorsed relationship coaches (including the 101s themselves).
Materials
Theory and exercises in PDF, video and text format.
A new universe of relational possibilities
From pods to support groups, check-ins (e.g., RADARs), rituals, new forms of kinship... Leading to relationships that revitalise rather than drain us.
Life-changing insights
Transformative insights into personal and relational dynamics, boundaries, communication, and self-responsibility.
Art Thou Ready?
Be this the year thou shalt find joy and closeness in thy bonds? The year you start casting away, once and for all, patterns that no longer aid you and the people thou holdest dear?
Calendar
The 3-hour monthly sessions are on the last Saturday of the month, from 11:00 to 14:00.
📅 25th October '25 (Saturday) ⬅️ Start date
📅 29th November '25 (Saturday)
📅 13th December '25 (Saturday)
📅 31st January '26 (Saturday)
📅 28th February '26 (Saturday)
📅 28th March '26 (Saturday)
📅 25th April '26 (Saturday)
📅 30th May '26 (Saturday)
📅 21st June '26 (Sunday!)
📅 25th July '26 (Saturday) ⬅️ Optional end date
Beyond the 25th of July 2026, the dojo continues, and you can, too. In the 2026–2027 course, we will study similar topics, but always from different points of view.
Who Are The 101s?
We — Tiffany and Lito — are long-time collaborators, facilitators and organisers. We are deeply curious about what makes relationships work and what helps people grow over time. We’re not here to give answers, but to hold space for the real, often messy, always powerful process of personal and relational revelation and transformation. Together, we create structured, reflective and sometimes magical spaces that allow individuals and groups to explore, feel, learn, and shift.
Our facilitation is grounded in years of studying communication, relationships, and conscious living. Between us, we’ve organised, led, facilitated, and
moderated debates, book clubs, team processes, dojos, support groups, workshops, activism parties, and trainings. We're on what we hope is a never-ending journey of learning the skills for difficult
conversations — our ongoing, perennial focus. Finally, we’re walking our own messy, tender paths of growth — both separately and in various relationship styles.
Experts
'tis good to know that the 101s, apart from organising and facilitating the space, shall be learning and exploring with thee. Even though we have years pondering deeply o'er these matters, we don’t pretend to be experts. In fact, we don't pretend to be anything. Only pretty. Exceptionally pretty.
A Note for Feminist Men
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How are you? But, more importantly, where are you? We wonder how surprised you are if we tell you that, again and again, the people interested in working on their relationship skills, communication, awareness of how trauma impacts us and others, and so on, are by and large women. Which is ironic, because the people that need it the most, if we are to work towards a more just world, are us, men!
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So, especially if you think feminism is the way forward, here’s a serious question: what are you going to do to help rebalance this equation? Join the dojo? Send this link to your male friends? Organise some events yourself on these topics?
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Whatever it is, let’s go! Let’s make the steps right now towards the kinds of societies we yearn for. /wp:paragraph
F.A.Q.
Who is this for?
This dojo is for people who are willing to look inward and get curious about how they relate. Maybe you’ve noticed recurring patterns in your connections—like pulling away, over-giving, or losing yourself in someone else—and you’re ready to understand these patterns more deeply, in order to finally transform them. Or maybe you’re in a relationship that’s important to you, and you want tools to meet conflict with care and stay connected through change.This space is for you if...
♦️ You want to learn and grow through the inevitable relationship challenges
♦️ You’re open to sharing from your own experience and listening to others with respect
♦️ You’re seeking support, tools, and perspective — not just validation
♦️ You understand that struggle is real, but you’re not here to stay stuck in it
♦️ You’re committed to the path you’re on (or willing to explore it deeply)
This space might not be for you (at this point in time) if...
🔶 You mostly need to vent or process pain without moving toward change
🔶 You’re feeling overwhelmed and not at all resourced to hold others as they hold you
🔶 You’re not open to feedback, new perspectives, or being challenged with care and kindness
And that’s okay. Sometimes what we need is a Compassion Circle instead — a separate, held space where we can fall apart, be witnessed, held, without the need to “get better”. The dojo is here for when you're ready to come back to practice.
So, if you’re someone who values personal growth, emotional integrity, and wants to bring more awareness into how you relate — with friends, lovers, family, or community — this space is for you. We’re not here to be perfect; we’re here to practice. What matters is your willingness to explore, reflect, and be real with yourself and others. What matters is a desire to be intentional in your relationships. We bring the rest.
Do I need to have a romantic partner to join?
Not at all, you don’t need to be in a romantic partnership to join. When we say "relationships", we mean it expansively: from (a)romantic to friendship to intimate in all dimensions, to familial, communitarian, or whatever label you use for those who matter in your life. What binds all these together is a desire to connect, care and enjoy.Will we have homework?
No. All the worksheets and materials that we share with you are totally optional.I'm afraid I won't be able to keep up / there will be too much information
We've designed the dojo for deep integration and change, not as a race. For instance, you will be able to process and implement the month's insights with your peer-support group. We will have regular check-ins with everyone in the dojo, to see what you need to make it the richest experience possible.What are your theoretical foundations?
We lean on three foundational sources:1️⃣ scientific / academic perspectives: the work of the Gottmans, Brené Brown, Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (Steven Hayes), Jungian psychology, especially the value of archetype analysis.
2️⃣ literature on relating, communication, emotions, the brain: How We Show Up, Polysecure, Polywise. Difficult Conversations.
3️⃣ Finally, of course, more than three decades of combined personal experience, together with vast second-hand learning through the many non-monogamous communities and events that we are connected to and organise.
What Others Say
"I really liked the way it felt both held and free, meaning there was structure, but it wasn't constrained. I felt included, engaged, and respected as a participant. Like it wasn't telling how to, and that we got back to the body. Also want more!"
"It's the best way to feel part of a community and not feel alone, confront opinions and see different point of views. It gives the chance to meet amazing people, make new friends. And it's a way to get to know other people's experiences and feel less like an alien. Personally, a way to push me to become more responsible."
🌸 Diana🌸 Participant 🌸
i be ready for
RELATIONAL JOY!
We give ye thanks.
We shalt reach thee soon!
We will get in touch with you with more information, and to schedule a call.
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